...Players and coaches are responsible for the actions of their spectators. Unsportsmanlike conduct penalties will be assessed against the team the spectator(s) represents. The spectator(s) will be asked to leave the park immediately or the team will automatically forfeit the game.
Let me put it to you like this. BEHAVE!
Chihuahuas are a misunderstood breed. Kind of skittish and loud. They want to be accepted as dogs, but we all know they look more like rats. Now I know Chihuahuas bark like crazy because they do not understand just how small they are in relation to everyone else. They long to feel like they are getting what they want. Chihuahuas dream of becoming some anorexic white girl's pet. She will feed you well, groom you nicely and carry you in her overpriced purse. Judging by how the women stood up for the men after getting mudstomped by the Titans the Jaguars are LIVING THAT DREAM.
We will not have to concern ourselves with this for much longer; they will be shown the exit this Sunday!
One more topic for consideration! Why are the two most senior teams in the neglecting to put in their rosters? I saw the wildcats with a player that has not been on the field ALL SEASON! Why is that? Are you above the rules?
Field 3
8am 4) Lions v 5) Dynasty - How passive-aggressive does Droptimus Prime have to be to suggest that the Lions intentionally blew a three touchdown lead in order to get the four seed? Even IF they faked the funk AT LEAST THEY SHOWED UP to do so! Both teams lost in stunning fashion entering this week. Lions usually play things tough in the first game of the playoffs. I do not think that changes. Lions in a rout.
9am 4) KGB v 5) Saints - KGB played arguably the most exciting game of the year. Six overtimes to decide the outcome for the eventual AFC East champions. You know what is funny? The Saints did something no one had been able to do all season! You would think I would lead with that? By beating the Chargers the Saints secured the 5 seed and a potential rematch against O's. It was a nice season by KGB, but that leaky defense will not get the job done against the Saints.
10am 3) Titans v 6) Falcons - Mollywhopped the Jaguars on the field, thrashed them on Facebook and won the hearts and minds of the rest of the MCFFL! I am going to thrash you a little bit right now. Please (wink wink) refrain from resorting to violence or threats of violence during your games (wink wink), even if it has been universally been accepted that they were deserving. Falcons managed to put together their best record in years by finishing with a win against Swavey Customs. For their troubles they will now get thoroughly thrashed by the Titans. I can tell you what will not happen; no one will be looking to fight at the end of this one unless the Titans want to eat the Falcons' rice and beans! Of course you could call ahead to the Lawrence Sub Shop (609-570-0197) and munch on a delicious sandwich while your favorite team gets donkey punched by the O's!
11am 1) Overachievers v 8) Jaguars - Ma'fuckers be proud of dat 5 and 5 record. Got dey ass mollywhopped and THRASHED by da Titans and was runnin dey moufs. How da fuck does a mah'fucker make it to da "A's" thru da back door like a ho and then start runnin dey mouf? Bitches be trippin. Ask a mah'fucker how dey got dat 5-5 record yo! Dem five wins came against straight ASS! Da teams dey beat had a combined record of 10 and 40! FOH! The O's almost had 10 win demselves. I don't even care for them mah fuckers and I swear to my fourth son Da'Quan dey gone beat dat Jaguar ass. I bet you da Jaguars get on da board after and start runnin dey moufs again 2! Whatever, I just hope dey take dat beatdown like a man with dey chest out! (My head hurts writing this SHIT)
Field 4
8am 2) Ivy Inn v 7) Beefcake - Man go 8-2 one season and you can become the team that holds tryouts for more talent. I ain't knockin your hustle. I wonder if Beefcake will do the same after a sudden surge in their win total. The two surprise teams get to face off and end the Cinderella season for the other. The clock strikes 12 for Beefcake on Sunday. Great season Word Wardie!
9am 1) Chargers v 8) Old Dogs - Chargers lost a meaningless game to a motivated Saints team will the motivated Old Dogs beat Rock Nation and backdoored their way to the A playoffs. The most compelling thing about this game is determining which team will wear the pinnies? Steve is my guy, but the Old Dogs will not play again until September!
10am 2) Wildcats v 7) Team USA - Needing a win to secure the second seed the Wildcats did enough to keep the Chargers off of a potential second round matchup. They get a Team USA who forfeited the last game of the season. Please remove your hats for the playing of the Star Spangled Banner before the game and Taps at the end of the game in memory of Team USA.
11am 3) Blend v 6) Warriors - Neither team played last week. The Warriors were finished and Blend went to Sea Isle for vacation. The best offense in the league goes up against the best defense in the league. This might be the worst spot in the playoffs to be in. The second round game will be against the Wildcats followed up by the Chargers. I say the Warriors get the rematch.
B Playoffs - B = Because I have to!
Field 1
8am 4) Station Bar & Grill v 5)Spartans - Station Bar and Grill finished up the way they finished. In between those two wins was a season of frustration. The Spartans were certainly more competitive than they were in the fall. Even still I just don't see them making a jump over the grillers.
9am 4) Bulldogs v 5) Eagles - There is talk of splitting the league to an A and a B bracket. I guess this is why! Bulldogs win.
10am 1) Raiders v 8) Silverbacks - Raiders missed making the "A" playoffs by ONE point. They are essentially an "A" in "B's" clothing. That being said, the silverbacks will be easily dispatched and given to thoughts of retirement.
11am 2) Quick Set v 7) Benchwarmers - After starting 0-4 the boys of Quick Set finished with a 4-2 flurry and a realistic chance of making the "A" playoffs. Give them a little credit, the Benchwarmers were good and faithful football servants. Their servitude will end on Sunday!
Field 2
9am 3) Giants v 6) Seahawks - Seems fitting that these two teams meet one another in the first round of the "B" playoffs. Neither team met the expectations set by their fall performances. Now they get to play to mercifully end the weekly exercise in futility. Both teams are athletic, but lack the ability to put together wins.
10am 3) McM v 6) Crimson Tide - Seems there is a quarterback controversy in the warehouse! HAHAHAHAHA. McM hadn't won since, shit I'm not sure they know. Now they replace the QB and find a W the last week of the season. Crimson Tide played in a 6-OT thriller, but ultimately came up short of winning as KGB scored on one play after the Tide had taken two in the SIXTH overtime. The Tide struggled finding the win column, but my sources have told me the QB situation in the warehouse will fall back to the incumbent. This means the Tide gets through with an upset.
11am 2) Swavey Customs v 7) Rock Nation - Rematch of an early season Swavey Customs win. #Slimeytron came in to pinch hit for the absent Bato in the last week of the season. While he looks the part he DID NOT play the part as the Falcons shut the Customs down. Rock Nation laid down for the eighth time this season as they allowed the Old Dogs to lift their collective legs and piss on the Rock! The Nation has managed to continue field a team each week, but they're going to need more than the FOWL tosses by Anthony Arroyo to beat the Swavey Customs. Season of promise ends in doom and gloom for Rock Nation.
Panthers get a bye and lament the fact that they didn't allow less points than the Old Dogs!