1. Chargers- Balance has once again been restored as the Chargers take their rightful place atop the rankings. I'm not too sure what to make of their loss to the Giants, but the Chargers have now shut out the Worriers AND Blend! They can lock the Lions into the B's with a win this Sunday.
2. Giants- The Little Giants handed Anthony Cirocington another LOSS that all but locked him and his Lions into the B's. An easy matchup this week with the Sucks... I mean Ducks (damn keyboard has the S and D so close together).
3. Saints- The 'Aints and the refs did everything they could to allow the Wildcats back into A contention. Benching Steve Kizzo Rock Kleinman (who?) was the best thing that could have happened to them as they held on to win a close one. The GOAT has looked a bit mortal in the passed two weeks, only throwing 5 TDs.
4. Raiders- What do you get when you play middle of the pack teams? Enough wins to get into the A's! A win this week against the all-star Panthers will secure a division win for the Raiders. After dropping 40 on Hooters, I think the Brothers Gluck will have no problem this Sunday.
5. Worriers- The 4-3 Worriers have the Tide, Struggle, and Giants to finish out their season. 2 losses could put them into the B's for a championship rematch with the Titans! However, I have faith in old Brucie to get the necessary wins to make it into the A's.
6. Blend- The Blend guys should have spent their week practicing instead of making a fake facebook name and arbitrary point spreads. I mean who makes a fake facebook name?!?! #masterbait #zero #shutout #weknowjelinslinesisyou #chargerbait #yallgotpurged #notrickplaythistime #droptimusaintdoshit #okimdonenow
7. Alter Ego- These guys have already locked up their division, granting them a top 4 seed (currently #1) in the NFC. With a win over the Wildcats this week, they can completely knock their division rivals into the B's while solidifying their #1 seed. Only the Saints and Raiders can overtake that spot!
8. Crimson Tide- My Tide took care of business against a tough Falcons team. Always go for the win baby! We lock up the division with one win. First up, the Worriers.
9. Falcons- With a loss to my Tide, the Falcons found themselves in a tight division race with the Seahawks. Dynasty shows up on their schedule at just the right time! Should be an easy win for the Falcons, bringing the division race into week 10.
10. Overachievers- This team, an opposite of the Raiders, has fallen victim to their schedule. Don't let their 4-4 record fool you! The O's 4 losses have all come to the current top 4 teams in the rankings. It does not get any easier as they play the 6th ranked Blend this Sunday in a MUST win game.
11. Seahawks- Omar Walker and friends have already spanked everyone in the division. The Falcons cohesive defense will not be able to stop them cause they have "too much talent on offense" THEY GON DO "WHATVWE WANNA DO"
12. Ivy Inn- At 4-3, the Innmates are in contention for an A berth, however, they are not at all comfortable. A tough game against the good looking Arroyo clan seems to be a must win for both squads, creating a playoff-like atmosphere!
13. Hooters- In the weakest division in our league, Hooters finds themselves in a great position to win, even at 4-4. While many other teams are fighting for their A playoff hopes, Hooters is celebrating their division lead. Seems unfair, but that's how it works sometimes. BB needs to find the O in these last two games to push his team into a top seed in the A's
14. Blackrock U- After an 0-2 start, 5-3 Blackrock have found themselves in a great position to reach the A's in their first season in the league! A win this week over the Old Dogs would lock them in!
15. Cock Nation- Whoops, I keep messing that up! Damned keyboard! Being in the AFC gives these guys an advantage. Only 10 teams are truly competing for the playoffs, and 6-4 should be enough to get in. A win this week against the Innmates will be enough to do the trick. Must win for both teams should make for a passionate game. Tony Arroyo has accomplished all of his athletic desires, so this race is just gravy.
16. Wildcats- In what was possibly Gil's first game all season without an interception, the Wildcats came from two scores down, only to have their game tying two point conversion knocked down with no time left. There is still a small glimmer of hope for the Cats, but they will need to win their last two and get help from a few other teams.
17. Panthers- The all-stars really handled their tough Bulldog opponents! That was sarcasm. I really can't wait to see their A matchup with the Chargers. I only wish my team was in a position to play them! I guess it's just not my season...
18. The Struggle- The Struggle may not be real! They sit at 4-3, currently 7th in the NFC, and have a doubleheader with the Silverbacks and Dynasty! They own one of the easiest paths to the A's that I have ever seen. This could be the biggest shock in the league, and a gift for anyone who plays them in the first round.
19. Lions- Anthony Cirocington LOSS really hit the nail on the head when he said "I feel sorry for the rest of the teams we play this year"! I feel sorry for them too! These teams want some competition but the Lions just aren't giving it to them. Maybe they will give some competition in the B's?
20. Team USA- Our nation's team had a great road into the A's. A win against the struggling McM squad would have all but locked them in. However, getting mollywhopped by Jelin's old B team really hindered their shot. Now they find themselves in a two week dog fight to make it to the big boy playoffs.
21. Titans- The Titans need more than a bye week for us to forget about their awful season. These are not the Titans that the movie wanted us to remember. Denzel would be ashamed!
22. Jaguars- The Jags sit at 3-6, and are on their way to 3-7 as they play the Saints this Sunday in their final regular season game.
23. McM- These guys finally looked like the McM squad that we have seen in the past. They gave themselves an outside chance at the A's, but will need ALOT of help. Start to prepare for the B's boys!
24. Ducks- The Sucks fell victim to Alter Ego on Sunday, snapping their win streak, and possibly ending their A hopes. Without Cotton, the Ducks will be smoked on the field quicker than in an Asian restaurant!
25. Old Dogs- The Old Dogs are currently on the outside looking into the A's. They need to win out to get in. If they can beat Blackrock this week, I think they can do it. However, I don't think they can beat Blackrock.
26. Spartans- The Spartans rocked the Silverbacks and Broncos! This is not impressive. Bulldogs next week. Why doesn't my team get a schedule like this???
27. Beacon- Bacon looked rusty. Perhaps it is because they haven't been to the fields in weeks! At least they showed up this week...
28. Dynasty- Through only 7 games, Dynasty has allowed 249 points against. That is an AFC low 35 points per game against! Allowing 7 touchdowns per game earns a bottom 5 spot in the rankings, and likely an early B exit.
29. Bulldogs- The 1-7 Bulldogs are going to need to try a new website for next season.
30. Broncos- The 1-7 Broncos prepare for the B's by asking everyone in the Burlington league to play with them. I hear they're offering pretty hefty contracts!
31. Silverbacks- The Silverbacks have hit an all time low, getting shut out by the previously 2-5 Spartans. These guys are winless with no hope in sight.
32. Commission- The Commission are officially out of commission.