Time for the picks...
Alter Ego v Ducks: Wayment! Alter Ego came back? Why? I guess they have $ to burn. Ducks could not field a team last week so they asked for a bye at the VERY LAST MINUTE! Come on man! I'm done trashing these two teams. Ducks win.
Ducks v Falcons: No matter how hard he tried to stay away they managed to bring him back in! Justin Arroyo is the latest slinger for the Falcons. Looks like he still has some JUICE with him as he led the Falcons to the edge of victory before it was snatched by the Trumpian hands of Bruce Stone and the Warriors. Now they get Bob-O and his ducks. Falcons hunt ducks. Looks like there will be duck on the menu this week.
908 v Blue Bulls - Slick Nick Alan decided to forego another season with Those Guys and started 908. Not sure 908 stands for the number of losses they will have this season nine or eight! The Blue Bulls didn't play. Looks like 908 will be closer to 8 losses than 9 after winning this week.
Bulldogs v Knights - Seems to be a mutiny in the doghouse. There is a sentiment among the Dogs that Bryan Turner needs to be sent to the dog park in the sky. More than the QB that defense needs to step up. The only person the Bulldogs stopped was me (not 1 catch!). The Knights lost to the defending champions in a very frustrating defensive struggle. I believe these two met last season with Ralph and the guys coming away with an upset win. I do not believe it happens again.
Suicide Squad v Average Joes - Suicide Squad started their march back to the finals with a big win over the Old Dogs. AJs took nut to the chin with a money shot from You Gone Learn Today. Mercer > Burlington. That holds up this week.
Indianimals v You Gone Learn Today - Dafuq is an Indianimal? We will find out this week as they play against a You Gone Learn Today that put a spanking on AJs. Indianimals now plays with Joey full time in two leagues, but have lost the services of Sprint King Dean "McDrops" McCleese. Not sure what the long term effects of his absence will be, I suspect a higher completion rate for Joe, but I am sure it will not matter for this week.
Raptors v Ravens - One team was thumped last week and the other team is the Ravens. I don't remember the Ravens. I feel like I should, but I have been inhaling the second-hand smoke from the sidelines so I don't remember too much. I pick the Raptors to win?
Elite v KPC - Charlie started with 3 players against the Raptors and still managed a scoring drive before the rest of the roster showed up. How complacent does a team have to be to show up late to a game the FIRST WEEK OF THE SEASON? KPC lost to the second best team in Burlington last week. Not a good sign for success against the three serious players of Elite!
Irish v Tune Squad - Another veteran QB seemingly retired, another veteran QB seemingly gets pulled back in. The return of Ott Phantavong also brings back his rocket throwing wife, (welcome back Reejay!). If Irish gets all of their players to the game they will quite literally have 357 players on the sideline. Tune Squad looked good against the Bulldogs with the exception of Tony who did not have one catch. I expect his perfect streak of catchless games to continue this week.
Overachievers v Monstars - Let me get this out of the way now. The Monstars will NOT go undefeated. They will be a very good team with very good athletes. Some of their athletes have impressive resumes, but let me make this one thing clear: NO ONE CARES. You're on the same field as the rest of us. We can appreciate what you've done, but no one is going to lay down for you. How insecure do you have to be to continue typing this shit looking for respect? I say a prayer for you every night.
God,
Grant OC the SERENITY to accept the things he cannot change
The COURAGE to change the things he can
and the WISDOM to know the difference!
The Overachievers and Brian "Too many middle names" Banks' lucky rabbits foot are going to hand the Monstars their first loss of the season.
Hardville v Old Dogs - Both teams lost to very good teams last week. Both teams have the potential to make noise in the league. Both teams have the capacity to make the B playoffs. Both teams can lose this game. Luckily only one of them will. Hardville will be that team.
Warriors v Those Guys - Field 4 isn't known for its compelling matchups, but it gets one this week. Last season the Warriors opened up with a win over Those Guys. Those Guys considered it a huge failure considering the Warriors were in the B playoffs. The Warriors only made the B's because of the grand conspiracy to keep them out of the A's. It wasn't the three score lead they blew the last game of the season or the 280 points the defense allowed which put them behind in tie breakers. We literally sit around and think about new ways to put the screws to the Warriors every season. Thanks for playing along. Those Guys are part of our dastardly plan! I think they help our grand conspiracy by beating the Warriors!
Lions v Venom - The big 3 and Royzell are gone, but the Lions still managed a 20-7 win! Interesting?!?!?!?! Venom was the beneficiary of a soft new team schedule which saw them finish the season 7-3. There is scuttlebutt in the 5-man minor league that Venom's finish in Mercer is akin to the minor league. Welp, now they get to prove or disprove that theory. Venom has earned a tougher road will they be up for the challenge? The Lions will be their first test, but not really. I actually think Venom wins this week